Gentlemen wanted! Who will invite me on a great vacation?

Hello my dear, don't you want to travel alone and are looking for a distinguished and charming companion? Are you wealthy and happy when you can enable an attractive man to have a wonderful vacation? Then you've come to the right place. With my open, cheerful nature, I will sweeten your vacation, no matter where you invite me. As a true lady, it goes without saying that you will cover all my expenses. After all, you want me to feel comfortable, don't you? I enjoy going out, shopping, and dining – you know, a well-groomed man costs a bit. We don't always have to do everything together, but a bit of a program would be fine. IMPORTANT: I do not offer sex. If you're looking for that, you're in the wrong place with me. I am a decent man. Therefore, I also attach importance to a single room in the hotel, which should be a matter of honor for you, as well as a small allowance. A small welcome gift (e.g., the latest iPhone) would be a nice gesture of your appreciation; this will help me keep our vacation together in good memory for a long time. Just send me your suggestion of where you would like to invite me and the possible timing. I will only respond to messages with an informative, current photo – you will get one from me in return if I like you. I will then get back to you if I'm interested. No response = no interest. Oh, and please only slim ladies up to a maximum of 35 years old – I'm not looking for a sugar mommy. ;) Best regards, Chris ---- Absurd? Perhaps. But these are exactly the kinds of ads you find every day in the "Ladies free" section, just the other way around. I'm curious to see if equality works in this section too. :-p